Transitions

This year has been a year of transitions for me in most areas of life. In August at EMI we focused our morning devotions on transitions.

Our office shifted location a month ago, see some pictures below. This was a big deal for us. Our office has been in the same neighbourhood for the past 12 years and we are shift to a location about 40 minutes away. The majority of our community has been living within walking distance and now we are spread across 5 communities over an hours drive. We moved from a duplex in a residential area of town to a beautiful office building that we are currently constructing. I was involved in the building design. We are sharing an office space with another organization, MAF. This move is going to change the way EMI functions as an organization and as a community, some of this I am looking forward to and other parts I am not.

EMI and MAF's new office building

Bridge to EMI's entrance at the front of the building

Lunch room

Atrium with lunchroom in background

Atrium with MAF's entrance in background

Conference room - during intern orientation

I am not moving out of the community I am in now, though the Joshua home did shift locations the same time the office moved. We are still in the same area but a new community. This means that my 10 minute drive became a 40 minute drive. Our office hours will be moving up half an hour so I have been getting up earlier.

As we focused our devotion time on transitions, some of the thoughts we talked about is: there is a time and season for everything, God is sovereign and He loves us so we can trust Him in the transition, even if we are not looking forward to the change we can still find things to praise God for, God desires to grow us so we should view change in that light. This time together was helpful to begin processing this transition as a community. It is going to take time to adjust to these changes.

This got me thinking about all the changes that have happened in my life in the past few years. It feels like life has been a constant state of transition. In the past 10 years I have moved houses 19 times. I have lived in 3 different countries. I have worked at 10 different companies. This year Uganda really became my home, I never pictured home being anywhere outside of Canada. Ashley and I started dating, got engaged and are getting married at the end of the year. I now live in a transition home with 5 Ugandans. The changes don`t look like they are going to stop anytime soon.

I have somewhat gotten used to changes, but I don`t really like them. I enjoy routine. I enjoy familiar. I enjoy the comfortable. But what I realize as I look back on the changes that have happened in my life is that change is often good for me. Change has led to the majority of growth in my life and cause me to mature. Change has brought me deeper into my relationship with God. God has used change to remind me that I can`t do life without Him. So while I don`t usually enjoy the changes, I can look forward to how I am going to change through them.

Something I have been reflecting on lately is Jesus call for us to follow him. He doesn`t give each of us a road map for life and set us loose to follow it. He leads us through life one step at a time. He didn`t tell me that I would go to elementary school, then to high school, then move away from my parents to go to university, then I would travel for a few months, then get a job and move to Toronto for a few years, then I would do an internship with EMI in the UK, then come back to Canada for a few months, then move to Uganda for a year, then come to Canada for 4 months, then move to Uganda for a few years, live with some young men, get married and settle in Uganda. If He had told me all that I don`t know if I would have come along. My life is nowhere near where I would have planned. But I have gotten here by following Jesus one step at a time. I am glad where I am, life is full and has a richness that it didn`t before.


One of the lessons that I have been learning is that while we follow God and are obedient to him our attitude is important. We can grudgingly follow him and it will feel like a chore. Or we can choose to follow him with joy. In Philippians 4 Paul tells us that we can be content in all situations, that is something God promises us. We can choose the joy he has set before us or we can sulk. Being joyful in difficult circumstances in not natural. But joy is the fruit of having God's Spirit. It doesn't depend on our external circumstances. Choosing joy has made a huge difference to enjoying this season of life.

Praises:
-moving houses has been a positive change for the Joshua home.
-we have a great community and family here in Uganda.
-we have a great group of 7 interns this term, they bring energy and excitement.
-EMI has a beautiful new office building.
-Ashley and I are getting excited about our upcoming marriage. This season has been one of preparation as we deepen our friendship and love for each other. Time together is refreshing and energizing for both of us, especially as this is a busy season of life for both of us.


Prayer Requests:
-life is busy. I find it challenging to balance two jobs, relationships in multiple countries, preparing for marriage. Life has been tiring lately.
-for the guys at the Joshua home as they adjust to a new neighbourhood and additional responsibilities.
-wisdom for myself on how to engage at the Joshua home.
-that Ashley and I would prepare well for marriage and for planning our wedding and all the activities surrounding the wedding but mostly that our relationship, wedding and marriage would glorify God and shine his light.
-this term at EMI my responsibilities are more managing other people than doing the work myself. This is a new experience for me. It is easy to focus on tasks and forget to love people.
-I am finding it easy to focus on tasks,to do list and results and I forget that relationships and people are more important.

This is my life.

I haven't written an update in a while, not for lack of things to write about. The other day I was reflecting on my life and realized how different it is then I ever planned. So I will try to give you some snapshots of my life. I also haven't been good at taking pictures, I will try to get take some soon.

-The seasons in Uganda are dry and rainy, there is no such thing as spring, summer, fall or winter here.

-I work for two ministries here. As a structural engineer for Engineering Ministries International. And as a house uncle for Doors Ministries. I never planned to work for a ministry.

-I raise support from friends and family to cover my salary and other expenses. I always thought I 
would support myself through my job.

-I live in a house with a Ugandan man (another uncle, Joseph, started a month ago) and four Ugandan teenagers. I never thought my first parenting type role would be with teenagers or Ugandans. It is a joy at times and it is very challenging at other times. I hadn't ever thought about how to raise kids or disciple before, but I am constantly thinking about it now.

-I was called into the head teacher's (principal's) office last week to discuss of one of my boys behaviour at school because she told me that I was the parent. In the mornings sometimes I get asked to sign homework slips for the boys under the heading parent's signature.

-I cook on a charcoal stove, take cold showers, wash my dishes with soap and piece of rice sack, wash my clothes by hand in a basin.

-The power is on more often than not, same with the water, but it is not surprising or worrisome if either if off.

-I ride my motorcycle each day to work, on the left side of the road.

-I get called by various names throughout the week, some familiar, some that I never knew existed. Matt, Matthew, Matty Matt, Uncle Matt, Mukeka (the Luganda word for floor mat, the boys call me that sometimes), smart phone (some of the younger boys calls me that because I have a simple phone that cannot do much more that make phone calls. They think I should get a smart phone), Muzungu (white person)

-My fiancee is from USA. If you haven't heard yet I am engaged to Ashley, who also works at Doors. You may not have even heard that I was dating someone. We have been engaged for about a month now, we dated for a little less that two months before that, we had been friends for about a year. We are going to get married in Canada this December, then return back to Uganda and live here until God brings us somewhere else. It has been exciting to see how God has brought us together and how the paths of our lives are converging. It has been confirmed to us in numerous ways that this is from God. Ashley is a wonderful gift from God. I couldn't be happier share my life with anyone else.

Most of these snapshots are things I never saw myself doing. If five years ago I could have seen what my life is now, I would not have believed it. Sometimes even now I don't comprehend how different my life is. But I am content with my life. I would not change it, not because my life is so exciting or happy, though it is at times. My life is also hard and challenging too. I wouldn't change my life because my life is full and abundant. This is the life that Jesus promises us he came to give (John 10:10). I have peace and joy even when life is difficult. I am walking through life with Jesus, I would not have it any other way. I pray that when I look at my life five years from now I can say the same thing. God has been so good to me.

Prayer Requests:

-That God would give me love and patience for the boys that I live with. Last we at EMI our devotions were on 1 John which talks a lot about love and Sunday the sermon was about loving according to the bible. It has been convicted for me that I don’t always have an attitude of love for the boys when I am frustrated. It has been exciting to see God changing that attitude already.

-Wisdom for myself and Joseph on how God would have us lead our house. It is beyond my experience so God needs to be directing us and giving me wisdom. I am thankful for Peter, one of the uncles at another house who has shared a lot of wisdom and insight with me as he has lived in a similar place.

-At EMI our office has a very full workload and we have a family that is suddenly leaving next week due to a family medical situation. This doesn’t surprise God but his workload will be spread to people who are already busy. Pray that God gives the strength and efficiency we need and that we wouldn’t lose focus of him during the busyness.

-Ashley and I have really enjoyed growing closer in our relationship. It has been exciting to see God clearly leading us together and preparing us for this season of life. We also feel like God has given us an opportunity to shine his light to the people around us through our relationship. Some of our community has not seen what a healthy relationship can look like.

-Ashley and I are trying to plan a wedding in Canada from Uganda. We aren’t very particular about the details, but more desire to celebrate with friends and family and glorify God.

Something New (or it feels like everything is new)

I have been back in Uganda for just over three weeks. It feels much longer. I find that time is that way when changes are happening and I haven't yet settled into a routine. So after three weeks it feels like three months.

Change is a funny thing. There are parts that are exciting and at the same time there are parts that are scary. One side of me welcomes the changes seeing the good that is going to come out of it, then a minute later I think that I am okay the way things are and I don't really want to change. I am comfortable with the familiar.

Last year after I decided that I was going to stay in Uganda longer. I felt God telling me that life was going to be different when I returned. I was okay with that, a little change is good. When I was back in Canada someone told me that life would be different when I returned to Uganda. I thought to myself I already know that. Little did I know how much change would happen. It feels like nothing is the same for me here in Uganda. I am still working at EMI, but my role/job description has expanded. I am living in a different neighbourhood. I am no longer living on my own, but living in a house with four Ugandan teenage boys, this has been a big change. As part of stepping into an uncle role at the house I have stepped back from many of the things that I was doing before, so my weekly routine has changed. I am attending a different church. I have even changed offices at work. There are several other dramatic changes that are just happening that I am not going to share about now.

Despite all these changes that have happened in the past few weeks, when I think about what my life is going to look like a year from now I have a strong feeling that it is going to be very different from what it is now. And I am okay with it. My feelings and emotion fluctuate as I am processing some of these changes and potential changes. But I am okay with it. Even with all of the uncertainty of life ahead, I know who God is. I know that he loves me and has good plans for me. I know that he will be walking with me in this and all I need to do is follow.

Yesterday at church the sermon was on knowing God's will for my life. This is a much broader thing than we tend to think. If we believe that the bible is God's word then anything it says regarding how we should live is God's will. I don't need to pray about whether or not to do something if God has clearly talked about it in his word. When Jesus was asked what the greatest commandment was he replied that we need to love God with everything we have, with our entire being, all our heart, soul, mind and strength. And we are to love our neighbour as our self. I can use this criteria to determine how I should act. If I am going to do something that is not loving my neighbour then it is against God's will for my life. If I want to do something that does not love God then it is against his will. God will not ask or desire for me to do something that is against his word.

But what about the choices we have between two things that are in agreement with God's word. How do we decide what to do? Does it matter which choice we make? With all the changes ahead of me how do I know if it is part of God's will for my life? After Jesus rose from the dead he said that he was going away so that the helper, the Holy Spirit, would come to us. God's Spirit is active in me, he guides me. In the midst of all the changes that are happening in my life, I have a deep feeling of peace. At times on the surface I am full of questions, my emotions and feelings tell me that these changes are crazy, I am not sure this is what I signed up for, I shake my head in disbelief at what is happening. But deep down I am feeling great. I have joy and peace and I am excited where God is leading me. The changes that have or will occur have been confirmed/affirmed by other people. It is not only me who is thinking these things, other people are telling me too. And God has been opening and closing different doors. Many of these new things would not have been my first choice, some of them would not have even been a consideration. But it has been clear that God has been preparing the way for me, both internally and in my external circumstances.

So I am excited about the adventure that God has before me. He is a good Father and desires good things for me. I am grateful for all the new things ahead of me.

Praise God for his faithfulness,
Matt

Prayer Requests:

Praises
-God is at work
-We had a new group of interns arrive at EMI this week. We are excited to have them
-I feel very settled amidst all of the changes in life
-There have been a lot of changes at Doors in the past month. God has been doing some cool things. Four new boys have joined the other house.
-I am happy that school starts this week for the boys that I am living with. The haven't always known what to do with the free time.
-New project are starting at work.

Requests:
-One of the main role as an uncle in the Joshua home is to continue discipleship with the young men I am living with. I have been wrestling with how to do this. The plan is to start meeting individually with each of the boys on a weekly basis to share how life is going. This was well received by three of the boys, not so well by the fourth. I plan to start this week. Pray that God would use that time to grow each of us closer to him.
-Pray for deeper relationships with the boys I am living with.
-Pray for deepening relationships as I settle into life longer term here is Uganda. There have been some encouraging things happening already. I am missing close relationships with male friends as I have fewer of those here.
-With all of the new things happening in my life it is easy for me to lose focus on God and instead focus on what he is doing. I don't ever want to desire the things that God does more than him.

My First Couple of Weeks Back

I have been back in Uganda for a little more than a week. After a day of travel I arrived back in Kampala. I was warmly welcomed at the airport by some good friends. After temporarily moving back into my apartment I went to hang out at Doors for the evening. I was warmly welcomed there. It has been great to see all the boys and the leaders. I missed them a lot while I was away.

The first Sunday our team at EMI had a potluck dinner to catch up and meet a new family that will be joining us later this year. They were visiting for a few days to check out the office and Uganda. I have received a warm welcome in many different places.

I have been able to slowly get back into the swing of things. But last week has felt like I was in limbo. At work I don’t have any design projects on my plate right now so I have been catching up and waiting for things to start up again. I moved back into my apartment for a week but I was waiting to shift over to Doors.

On Wednesday I had a meeting at Doors, first with some of the leadership and then with the boys that I am living with. We talked about how the house is going to run, the rules and responsibilities for the boys. It was a long meeting, about five hours. But it was good for me to start into my new role there; although there are occasional thoughts of ‘what am I getting myself into.’ On Saturday I moved in to my new place and got settled. So after a couple of days things are going fine. We will see what the next year holds. There are lots of new things this year that would concern me more but I know that God is with me through all of it. 

Here are some pictures of my new accommodations.

My room that I will be sharing with the other uncle.

Our living room, the boys room is through the door.

The front of our house.

The front of our house.

The courtyard between the two houses on the compound. The other house in the compound will be used as the school for all the boys at Doors. Our house is on the left.

The back of our house.

The entrance to our compound.

The front of the school house. Our house is behind.

This is staff week at EMI. We have meetings each day to look back over the past year and to talk about the year ahead. Today we discussed the vision for EMI as well as the vision for our office in Uganda. I am excited about the year ahead. There is a lot of transition happening in my life, at EMI and at Doors. I am excited to see where God is going to lead it all.

Prayer Points

Praises:

-I returned to Uganda fully supported. It has been great to see God provide abundantly.

-I have felt very welcomed back to Uganda. A reminder of the great community I have here

-My time back in Canada the past four months was very fruitful, more than I anticipated. Originally it felt like an interruption to the work that I am doing here in Uganda. But as I look back over this time, I can see that I am in a healthier position to continue serving here. God has again shown me that his plans are better than mine.

Requests:

-I have been a little sick the past few days, nothing serious, but it has been annoying

-I have a lot of new responsibilities on my plate at EMI and at Doors. I don’t feel equipped to do some of them, but I believe that God is leading me there and will provide the strength that I need each day.

-I am trying to establish a new routine with all the changes that have happened since I returned. So I am trying to discern what I should continue doing and what should change. One of those things is where I go to church, whether to go where I was before or to go where the remainder of Doors goes.

-While talking with different people about my role at Doors they have raised concerns about my wellbeing and getting enough time to look after my needs. I am not sure what that is going to look like. I ask for wisdom to find that balance.

-Doors is still looking for a second uncle to live in the house with me and share the responsibilities, we will also be sharing a room. In the interim one of the uncles at the other house with be helping me out.

May you be aware of God’s nearness today,

Matt

What am I getting myself into?

Returning to Uganda is on my mind. I have been back in Canada for almost four months. It has been a great time to connect with people. Reflecting on my time here I can see that it has been an important season to get refreshed and equipped for the next chapter in Uganda.

I am excited to be returning to my role at Engineering Ministries International. I really love the organization and the people. I look forward to seeing what is going to happen over the next three years.

During the past year in Uganda I spent a lot of my free time volunteering with Doors Ministries. You can read a bit about my experience this past year in a previous post. Upon returning to Uganda my involvement at Doors with expand. Doors is expanding and growing, it has been exciting to see how God has been working to prepare the way. One of the areas that they are expanding is in their Doors home. The current home has been open for almost three years. It has been amazing to see how God has worked in these boys lives, taking them from the streets of Kampala and transforming their lives through His love. As these boys become young men, we want them to continue to mature, grow, and take on more responsibility and independence. So Doors is opening Joshua Home, where these young men will transition as a step towards living independently. Upon opening the four oldest boys in the current home will be shifting there along with two "uncles". The role of the uncles is to live life along side these young men and help guide and disciple them. Joshua Home is a bridge for these young men between the current home and living on their own.

So why am I telling you all of this. Well I am going to be one of the uncles at Joshua Home. I am very excited about this opportunity. I am also quite nervous about it. Sometimes I think "what am I getting myself into?" But I feel that God is leading me to this. The four young men I will be living with I have gotten to know a bit over this past year. I am excited to deepen those relationships and continue to invest in their lives and to be a part of the transforming work that God has been doing through Doors Ministries. My responsibilities at Joshua Home will be outside of my working hours so this will not affect my work with EMI.

This is going to be a big transition for me. My living arrangements are changing from living in an apartment by myself to living in a house with 5 Ugandan men, sharing a room with one of them. I will be taking on additional responsibilities. It will be a lifestyle change and occupy much of my free time. Despite all of these changes, I am looking forward to it. It is a worthwhile investment and an opportunity for me to learn how to serve better. It is interesting to see how God can work in our lives. I remember praying a while ago for God to make me less selfish. In this role I see lots of opportunity/necessity to be less selfish.

Prayer Points:

Praises
-I am returning to Uganda in two weeks fully supported. God has been faithful to provide.
-My time in Canada has been encouraging and fruitful. I can see God's purpose for this season.
-God is doing great things at Door Ministries, I am excited to continue to be a part of it.

Requests
-I foresee living at Joshua Home will be challenging, in a good way. I won't be able to do it in my own strength. I need God to give me his heart for people and strength each day to work at EMI and at Doors. I don't always feel equipped for the role I am stepping into. I see the temptation to take on more responsibility than I need to. I need to do my part but it is God who is doing the work. I need to let him do it.
-God has been doing a great work in my life and the lives of the young men I will be living with. I ask that God would use us to continue the work that He has begun.
-God has been faithful to provide for Doors. It is very clear that if God had not been providing, Doors would not have survived and grown to what it is. Pray for God to continue to provide. If you would like to be a partner with Doors you can give here.

God will provide, but I need to let him

A few weeks ago I sent an update and request for my support raising. At that point I was a little under half way to my support goal and starting to feel the pressure. I believe that returning to Uganda to continue working with Engineering Ministries International is where God is leading me. I know that he will provide for whatever I need to make that happen. But often there is a disconnect between what I know and what I truly believe. There is part of me that was uncertain if God would provide in time to return. As a result I was trying hard to do everything that I could to raise as much support as possible.

So as time has been drawing closer to my return date I was getting worried about it not happening in time. When I asked God what I should be doing to raise the remainder of the support, he told me to pray and ask other people to pray. That wasn't the response that I was anticipating. I was expecting that I would need to do something. But God wanted to show me that it is in his control and I needed to stop taking control myself.

So that is what I did and God has been faithful. In the following few days support came in and God has met my monthly budget as well as my initial startup costs. I am blown away at the generosity of God's people and how he uses community to do his work.

So I ask you to join me in thanking and praising God for his provision and desire to grow us through the process.

I am getting excited to be returning to Uganda. I leave Canada on January 1st. Soon I will share some of the things that I am excited about happening when I return.

Blessings,
Matt

I Want To Do It Myself, But I Can't

Being back in Canada has given me opportunity to reflect on life over the past few years. I am truly blessed to see how God has worked in my life to completely change my focus and direction. I have a passion and excitement for following Jesus like I have never had before. I love sharing this.

Despite this, life is not without its hardships and difficulties. God has been so faithful these past few years and yet I still doubt. The biggest priority for my time in Canada is to be raising support to join staff at Engineering Ministries International. I strongly feel that this is where God has been leading me, so my expectation is that it would be easy. But it has not always been. I have really enjoyed sharing my experiences with people, but I have been reluctant to ask if they want to partner with me. I know that God will provide what I need, he has done it so many times before. I know that God is not restricted by money, he made food and water come from no where for the Israelites in the desert. I know that I am his son and he desires to give me good things. But I don't fully believe it. I don't behave as if I know these things are true. I still try to work hard to achieve them in my own strength. I forget to ask God to provide for my needs. I see some money come in and think about what I need to do to get the rest of it. God has been continuing to bring to mind that I don't have because I am not asking and relying on him.

So here I am with 5 weeks left before I go to Uganda and I am getting worried and anxious about my support raising. I think how will it come before I plan to go back. I have a plane ticket booked for Jan 1, but I am required to have my support raised before I return. How am I going to do this? That is the lie that the devil is telling me now. Who am I to think that God wants to use me? Why would I think that people would want to give to the work I am involved in? It won't happen, you are not going to make it. All of this happening when the past two weeks have been great. I feel so ready to go back to Uganda. God has been strengthening me and growing me for what is next. He is teaching me to rely on him more. The reality is the lies the enemy tells us are not completely false. I really cannot do this on my own, but I want to, telling me I can't makes me want to try harder and prove myself. That has been the hardest part about support raising, I must rely on God to provide through other people. But the truth is that God will provide. He has been providing. I have been encouraged by other people's generosity and excitement.

God has been inviting me back to him. To rely on his provision and his guiding. He has placed me in a wonderful community. So he is telling me to reach out to them.

First in prayer. Even in prayer I want to do it on my own. I want to be able to pray about it myself and not ask anyone else to join me. But we are placed in a body, a family for a reason. We are called to share life. So I ask that you pray with me that God would provide the support I need by January 1st. Pray that God's truth would speak loudly above the lies I am hearing. I am in need of monthly partners, pray that God would stir the hearts of the people he has prepared for this and that he would guide me to talking with the right people.

This is where I am struggling today. I thank you for joining me in this journey, through the mountains and the valleys.

May God meet you where you are today, as he has been meeting me.
Matt

If you would like to partner with me or think of someone else who might be interested check out this
page. Please share with anyone you God places on you heart.